A Very Scary Place

'My head's a very scary place; don't want to walk it alone...'
Christopher Cross, "I Know You Well' (1998)

In the past I've focused on advice and counsel which can be passed to a larger, more general public, especially since a sports editor asked whether he could borrow one or two of my posts.

Weekly exposure in a large-city newspaper leads to a number of outcomes: You end up with new 'friends.' You also gain new 'detractors.' Both are necessary to the aspiring writer. There's nothing like seeing your weak points exposed by a person who wants to "make points" in the public spectrum - they provide an unpaid (but not unappreciated) editorial function in the feedback loop. You go back and think a little more critically about the next topic; you read the first draft a little more critically. You make certain there's more "muscle" than fat. The editor has less material to polish, change or tweak.

This post is (most likely) not going to be sent up the line. Here is where I temporarily revert to that often self-abusive "make-you-go-blind-if-you-keep-writing-like-this" type of writing which to many appears to be the sustenance of bloggers. I feel a need to talk about a "very scary place" I briefly visited this past weekend. Some details will be trimmed to save friends and loved ones from needless exposure.

I like beer. However, I would not say I have a drinking problem. More often than not I am the person who sees the proverbial "line drawn in the sand," over which I dare not step for fear of ruining my personal, financial, or professional well-being. I will have anywhere from zero-to-three beers a day during the work week. There is the rare - perhaps two or three times a year - occasion when I will dance at the line and mock the Fates, after which I go back to my comfortable bed and sleep for a few hours. When I awaken, I chuckle at my good fortune, grab a cup of coffee and march smartly.

This weekend I have to admit I stepped over the line. It wasn't a big step, but it was a step. In the 25-plus years since I drunkenly stumbled out of a bar in my hometown and inflicted $600 worth of damage on my brand-new pick-up truck, I think I can say I've "stepped over the line" perhaps three times. For me, this involves or has involved drinking (probably in this most recent case) the equivalent of a 12-pack of American beer and climbing into or onto a motorized vehicle.
I've seen other people (try to) do this. In a far worse state of inebriation. With facial trauma from the outmanned tag-team match against gravity and disequilibrium that state of drunkenness so stealthily arranged. I've seen a few really good, and graphic examples of why not to drink to that state. Of course, when we are having a great time we don't quite think about those consequences.

I definitely thought about the potential consequences - financial, judicial, professional, medical, and so forth - once we returned (safely) home. The next morning's run turned into a long walk and chat with my wife. She now understands why I prefer to not drink as much as the next party animal. And naturally, my body decided to let me feel the lowest level of the potential consequences through the remainder of the day. A headache would have been acceptable. But no...my stomach taught me a lesson.

Small, 12-ounce opaque drinking cups are your friend. Large, transparent 21-ounce beer mugs are your friend, too...but for a brief period of time. Having the courage to say "I think I've had enough," or to ask whether someone (sober AND of legal driving age) can make certain you get home safely might not make the hangover, headache or gastrointestinal distress any less intense, but it might be much less expensive for you. And the ones who run with - or love - you.

Motivation and Motives

Several close family members have been in a state of transition, or flux. Their decisions on who, what & where they want to be have been made in close proximity to my wife & me. Some decisions have been made which made us ask the classic 'what were they thinking?' Other moments has made us wonder, in the words of the old Paul Carrack tune 'how long?' However, it "ain't" us having to live with the direct consequences of the decisions...only the indirect ones.

Been thinking a great deal about motivation and motives the past few months, especially since my experience in New Orleans last April. I had a few people make derogatory comments about my swimming ability (or the lack of) in the period almost immediately afterward, but it hasn't affected my motivation for getting into the pool...too much.

But I will be honest that motivation waxes and wanes over the course of the year, depending on the weather conditions. The holiday season at the end of the year is, naturally, a challenge in and of itself because of the social functions which fill time. Summer, on the other hand, are filled with many other outdoor activity opportunities which can fill the calendar. Balance between training schedule and social calendar - especially folks who run more for entertainment and personal fitness - is a necessity. Their motivation is often external...compare your fitness to that of your friends. Or "frenemies."

Serious runners have another challenge. Depending on your definition of "serious." Motivation for the serious runners is more internal.

The motives? Those are as personal as the runners themselves.

SO, if you're beating yourself up right now because of the present conditions, take a moment or two to think about whether you're just trying to put a check in the box or if there's a good reason to get beat down...right now.

Lipstick On My Mirror

First, I want to wish each of you a Happy New Year, 2010. I hope you had a great holiday season & managed to stay healthy & happy. By now, I bet (or at least hope!) you have set at least one goal for the new year, or have made a resolution (if you’ve gone off track in some area) to change something in your lifestyle. This year I’m stepping away from some of the trial-and-error aspects of my training & reuniting with the tried-and-true ones.

I read something on the web the other night having to do with goal-setting – I’ve talked about setting S.M.A.R.T. goals before. This particular article added two more aspects to the goal-setting process, making the goal S.M.A.R.T.E.R.

S.M.A.R.T. goals are: Specific. Measurable. Achievable. Reasonable. Time-Focused.

And the E.R. added in stands for: Exciting. Recorded.

When I read the last two, I realize many well-meaning persons – even if they do make a smart goal – choose goals that have little if any excitement. How many write their goals down on a three-by-five card, sheet of paper, first page of their daily planner…or in lipstick on the mirror? Very few have something staring them in the face each day which makes them accountable for their plan of action.

That’s the difference between a not-so-exciting (e.g., weight-loss) goal & setting a more-exciting (e.g., finish a half-marathon) goal. Often the not-so-exciting goal outcome is the unintended result of achieving the exciting goal. It’s a lot easier to get up out of bed to go run ten miles on Sunday morning because you’re training for a spring half-marathon than it is to go run ten miles on Sunday morning because you want to lose ten pounds by Easter.

Speaking of Sunday morning runs; we've had a group doing an 8-mile loop, going out from a local park most weeks (weather permitting) at 7:30…give or take a minute. My Facebook announcement of the event usually says 7:25 (see Without Limits to learn why…). To make certain nobody is left behind we’ve regrouped every mile or so, or at the top of the hills… Once enough folks are familiar with the loop I can think about going out in pace groups, but for the time being I want to make certain everyone is accounted for. Some of my masters’ swimming & triathlon companions & some of the local RRCA club members have come for early season training. Most everyone heads off to complete their plan of the day, but we’ve left coffee/bagels on the agenda in case one feels compelled to recover with the help of caffeine, complex carbohydrates & other good stuff.

Weather conditions haven’t been conducive to track work lately. It’s depressing (for me, too!) to train in the dark & cold. But this is temporary – it’s easier for all to tolerate when we’re all suffering together. I’ll show up at the track if you do.